if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
