I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
