u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Mom said you looked used
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
