I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
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