Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
its not stalking. its research.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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