Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
