i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
