white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
and you fell through a lawn chair
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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