sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
