she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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