break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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