Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
