hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
