found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You can't motorboat a personality
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
