we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize
