party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
