Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
