Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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