Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I think i got beer on your cat.
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