I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
