Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
