How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Just puked most of my soul out..
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
