Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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