well you can't waste a boner
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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