wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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