we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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