someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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