I like my sex mixed with concussions.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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