he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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