2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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