quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Randomize
