trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
