He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
