Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
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