Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
