Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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