You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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