but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Found your dick twin last night
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
