this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
