i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
so explain again why im purple
no
there was a trapeze. enough said
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
