i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I just found puke in my bra..
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
