i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
