Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
