I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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