I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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