why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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