My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
