ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
it's like iHOP with fire
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
