Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
