We need to rekindle our bromance
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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